“Ok, so tell me your story!” I said over the loud music in Greene Turtle in Crofton.
“The whole thing?” Sameer asked, laughing.
“Yeah! I got time,” I replied, settling into my burger and fries.
Sameer grew up in rural Indiana. His family moved there from India when he was five years old. One day, in 2nd grade, while playing basketball with some of his friends, one of them asked him if he was a Christian. When Sameer told him that he wasn’t, his friend replied, “My daddy said you’re going to hell if you’re not a Christian.” That day was the last day those friends played basketball with Sameer.
Understandably, that short interaction paved the way for years of pained interactions in his community. As the only non-Christian immigrant family in the small, Christian community, Sameer was consistently faced with rejection. As a young kid, the society around him silently communicated that Christians are exclusive and prejudiced towards people from other backgrounds. There was a closed door to integration with the community, based on a cultural barrier that he wasn’t allowed to cross.
Then he met Mary.
In middle school, Sameer made a friend and found a family that reopened that door for him. The mom, Mary, communicated through her warmth and affection that you can be different and still be loved and included. She began to force open the door that the community had slammed shut. But even still, Sameer was faced with continued rejection. Rejection came in the form of sideways glances or consistent “no’s” to invitations. If you weren’t part of the Christian community, it was hard to even get someone to go to the dance with you.
Mary’s love for Sameer and the inclusion he felt in that family had a lasting impact. So much so, that Sameer went to church with the Irish-Italian, Catholic family. He even went as far as to go through the Catholic catechism and be confirmed. He started to feel a part of something bigger.
But once out of the comfort and care of that family, Sameer’s relationship with the church started to waver. While he was in law school, the Catholic church experienced great scandals in the midst of the plethora of abuse reports. Sameer quickly distanced himself from the church. The door closed again. He had opened himself up to placing his trust and identity in a group of people only to have it backfire again. From that moment on, Sameer said he was an atheist; how could God let something like that happen?
In college and beyond, he found that there was a much more diverse and inclusive culture outside the rural Indiana town he grew up in. And people really didn’t care what your religion was. Up until a year or so ago, his college, early career, and adult life had been spent in comfort as an American who was free of the baggage of religious affiliation. He even challenged people in their faith at times, trying to get them to think outside their box.
Then he met Bailie.
They met online and immediately hit it off. Before long, Sameer was in love and wanted to communicate that love through supporting Bailie and participating in things together. Over two years ago, Sameer started attending Bay Area Community Church with Bailie. He showed up to support her. He stayed because he felt something new.
Getting to know Bailie more, watching people interact with one another in the church lobby, and hearing the sermons on a Sunday morning, Sameer saw a sense of unhindered joy. It was enticing, even beautiful. So much of his life had been bogged down by the stress of society around him. Watching his girlfriend and people at church walk around with such freedom and peace made him curious beyond control.
So he started to write an email. Initially, he didn’t want to tell Bailie for fear of getting her hopes up for something he wasn’t ready for. Even though she didn’t put any pressure on him to be Christian, he had to talk to someone about it. He wrote the email, saved it. Rewrote it, saved it. Re-rewrote it, and saved it again. The memories of rejection came flooding back as he considered sending the vulnerable email out to the all-too-generic info@bayareacc.org. Would these people close the door, too? Should he just delete the email and spare himself the humility? He hit send.
Then he met me.
The email actually went to several people in the connecting department at BACC and they thought Sameer and I might be a good match to chat. I am forever grateful for that connection. After a few emails, Sameer and I set a date and met up for happy hour.
It ended up being more than an hour as we laughed through each other’s life stories at Greene Turtle in Crofton. We started the beginnings of a great friendship that night. On Monday, April 1, 2019, two guys walked into a bar and two friends walked out.
The rest of the Spring and Summer, Sameer and I met every few weeks to catch up and talk about things that were on our minds. We talked about the significance and supremacy of Christ. We talked about the story of the Israelites through Scripture, why bad things happen to good people, and the difference between foreknowledge and predestination. Each time we met, Sameer had more questions about faith in Jesus. He spent time reading the Bible with his kids and letting Scripture shape his life.
After a few months of this, I asked him one day, during another one of our happy hour meet-ups, “Sameer, what’s stopping you from fully committing to Jesus and putting your faith in him?”
“Actually, I don’t think anything. So what do I do now?” I almost choked on the chicken wing I was working on. We talked more about the signifiance and weight of fully committing to Jesus. That night, Sameer professed his faith in Jesus.
That brisk, September evening, two friends walked into the bar and two brothers in Christ walked out. As I opened the door for him while leaving the restaurant that night, all I could do is thank God for his faithfulness.
