Her Name is Love

We walk into the assembly hall. The students are patiently sitting, waiting, anticipating our arrival. We are greeted with eyes of curiosity. Some of the locked eyes are coupled with a jump of the eyebrows, showing the affection and acceptance. Other eyes are joined with welcoming smiles. As we walk through the parted sea of children, my heart swells. I barely know these children and I love them. “Break my heart for what breaks yours” - God is answering my prayer.

We take our seats at the head of the assembly. I nervously sit down. Sitting down is a commitment. Am I ready for sitting here for the duration of this gathering? Of course I am- but why do I feel unsettled? My heart yearns for more. For more connection. For more provision for these children. For more peace in this nation. My mind darts back to the place we are sitting just as Principle Peter directs his open hand in my direction, saying something in Dinka. His hand progresses along the line of my fellow brothers and the children applaud.

My heart jumps. NO! I should be applauding you, sweet, innocent children! Look at all that you have endured! Look at all that you have lived through. You see me as the White Savior, but I am nothing. I am only here with the desperate hope of being a mere vessel. Do not look at me with expectant eyes. The pressure is too great. Look to Jesus, dear ones. Look to our true provider.

There is a shuffle. I realize there are phones out, digitally marking this moment for us through picture and video. I take mine out and snap-snap-snap, taking in my surrounding as best I can. I need to share this moment with my people! I need to share this moment with Clancy! With my church! People come and see, the Lord is at work here!!

Then the shuffle solidifies into a murmur- no- a hum… wait… now its a song. The children are singing. The phones are recording the song. Their sweet voices fill the air and my heart expands. In the blink of an eye, my mind darts, races, explores...

My heart is expanding?? How could it expand, Lord? I already love the children in the townships of South Africa where the hope for a better life was just across the railroad tracks, where the Gospel was distorted, where terrible things had been done with the Bible leading the charge, where you took me in 2010.

Lord, I already love the workers on the farm in Ghana where you had me in 2012. Father they just want to provide for their families! They want to Prosper! Oh, Lord, why couldn’t you have let me uphold the promises I made to those people. I thought that was where you were calling us to move.

But no, you took me to Malaysia. You broke my heart in ways I never thought it could be broken. You showed me your love for Muslims. Lord, you gave Clancy and I the story of Rokia. We already love Rokia. Why couldn’t we have gone there? Why, Lord? But no- you had to show us Turkey, too. You had to take me to the top of that castle, with the sounds of the beautiful culture of the place where your church first started to take root, in a place that does not call you King. Oh Father… my heart already loves the people of Turkey. Why couldn’t we have gone there?

But you had to bring me to South Sudan. I love South Sudan. I love these children, Father. Why couldn’t you have just brought me here to begin with? This is what I always wanted! I wanted to do community development and share the Gospel. That’s what they’re doing here in the most raw way. This is it, Father! Why do you do this to me???

My mind blinks back to the song. I must mark this moment. The question still ringing in my mind. “Why do you do this to me?” The singing crescendos and I see this little girl, in the front row.

Dear, sweet little girl. What hardships have you seen? What is your name? Maybe you wear your name. For to me you are simply that. You are LOVE.

LORD, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TEACH ME RIGHT NOW??

YOUR HEART IS TOO BIG FOR ONE PLACE.

YOUR HEART IS TOO BIG FOR ONE PLACE?

Your heart is too big for one place.

Wow… My heart IS too big for one place.

I am on the right path. I am here, now, following my Father’s will. I will continue. My heart IS too big for one place. You have broken my heart for what breaks yours, Lord. You have answered my prayer. Please don’t stop. But please take it easy on me… I’m not you… Just help me love like you. Sustain me, Father.

I blot the tears out of the corner of my eyes and embrace the flood of confidence, finding comfort in the familiar feeling of a renewed vision. The teacher’s are moving around now, organizing school supplies. Ok, Trevin… Back to the now. Be present. And don’t forget to take pictures!

My heart is too big for one place.

For more reasons than I can figure out, the smile won’t drop from my face.

Innocent.

INNOCENT.

The word kept repeating in my head.

INNOCENT.

We weren't even sitting in the tent for ten minutes before this beautiful little girl nudged my arm and made the international sign for "take a picture." I immediately obliged and then showed her herself before looking at the captured moment. She giggled and skipped away towards the other kids. I looked down at this picture, starting to re-enter into the interpreted conversation between my teammates and the Syrian teacher, and cried. "Why am I crying??" I thought. "No, seriously, Lord... Why am I crying right now??" I earnestly prayed. No answer. I wiped the tears away and tried to fully reengage.

The next day we were back in the Syrian refugee camp. This time we were set to have tea with one of the patriarchs of the community. As we took our places inside the tent, sitting criss-crossed on the clean cement, Munnah came hopping in followed by her older sister and a tray of tea. In just a few minutes, Munnah was parked next to me, shoving an English book in my hands and gesturing for me to read to her. My heart swelled and I again prayed, "Lord, why do I feel this way??"

INNOCENT.

The word kept repeating in my head.

INNOCENT.

This beautiful, innocent little girl has lived six of her eight years of life in a refugee camp in Lebanon. She doesn't deserve this. This world is broken. This world needs the hope of Jesus Christ. I pray Munnah does not lose her joy, her sweet, innocent joy. I pray she remains as innocent as one can in this world. And I pray she finds the eternal hope found only in Jesus.

Thoughts and Notes on T4G

About ten days ago, four of the five residents from BACC went to a conference together: Together for the Gospel. We had a great time engaging in the talks but probably the most notable experience was the time we spent together, downloading what we’d learned and getting to know each other better.

T4G Overall

I’ve not done this before, but felt it was useful for myself in thinking through the conference. I decided to give the conference a score, based on nothing other than my own perspective and preferences. 

So, overall, I give 2018 T4G a 6.5/10. Here is the breakdown.

• 7/10 for organization: tough to organize 12,000 people, very uncertain for first two days where and when the main sessions were, despite the app. App was neat but could have been better utilized.
• 3/10 for diversity: no female voice, no Latino voice, no non-American speakers. Only reason a 3 instead of a 1 because there was diversity in age and they did have two black speakers. 
• 10/10 for free stuff: came home with two dozen free books, equal to more than conference cost, much to my wife’s dismay.
• 8/10 for messages: very very rich, exegetical preaching. Only once or twice did I disagree with the basis or doctrine behind a talk. Some unforgettable, trend setting talks as well (see below).
• 5/10 for conference food: ended up not eating it despite paying for the food plan… wish I could get my money back. (also Louisville has great food options, so why I bought the food plan, I’m not sure).
• 3 OR 9/10 for breakout sessions (so taking the average: 6/10): 3 because there were so few and difficult to get to or know content ahead of time (I really like breakouts/workshops - they are more engaging in my opinion). 9 because I went to all three David Platt’s breakouts (not on purpose) and they were very very well done. Lots of tangible, applicable information (see below).

The Notable Talks:

I would highly, highly recommend watching these talks, in the order I have them listed below. If something is being shared that makes you uncomfortable or you disagree with, I encourage you to persist and watch through to the end.

1. HB Charles’ message about the cross. This was such a fantastic, grounding talk on the truth of the cross and its ramifications for life.
2. David Platt’s message about racism. This is the one that you might disagree with. Or maybe it will make you jump up with affirmation. Either way, I encourage you to listen to it and ask God to show you what he wants you to take away from it. Comment below your thoughts!
3. Ligon Duncan’s message about holiness. This is an excellent follow-up to Platt’s message. I highly recommend watching both of them. Ligon talks about our call to holiness, how we’ve been set apart and made whole. 

I did not sit in on all of the talks, so feel free to check out the other recordings on the T4G homepage. There was only one talk that I sat in on (ok, actually, I got up and left... don't be like me, though!) that I had a hard time listening to based on the speaker’s thoughts on church, but you’ll have to message me separately if you’re curious about that.

My Notes on Platt's Breakout Sessions:

If any of these notes don’t make sense, comment below or email me. Below is David Platt and I. After being at all three of his sessions, I think we were basically best friends. 

Cross Preconference

• Not all Christians are missionaries and we dilute the definition when we call them that.
• All are called to make disciples. Missionary is different than Christian.
• A missionary should be defined as a Christian, set apart by the Holy Spirit, sent by the church to cross cultural, linguistic, geographic barriers to make disciples of unreached people groups.
• How to know you are called: read you Bible. Fast regularly.
• Missionary training starts in the local church.
• Missionary training should not end in the local church.
• Short term missions develop a culture of missions well.
• Instead of asking the congregation “If God is calling you to be an overseas missionary...” ask the question “If you feel like you want to talk to your pastors/elders to discern whether you are being called to be a missionary…”
• “There is no such thing as transformation by aviation” - in other words, anyone who is planning/feeling called to be a missionary should be doing cross-cultural disciple making at home.

12 Critical Issues in Global Missions

1. The authority of the Bible. There is increasing skepticism on the authority of Scripture worldwide. Only 64% of senior pastors think studying the Bible is essential. The authority of Scripture is SO foundational, critical, essential for missions (and salvation).
2. The content of the Gospel. Must be clear on what it is and what all it has done; don’t dilute the gospel in an effort to lead more to Jesus. “The last thing the world needs is the exportation of nominal Christianity.”
3. The necessity of evangelism. We will be tempted to be silent, but the greatest need of humankind is the Gospel. Romans 10:13-15 - the Gospel is never shared in Acts/NT without the tool/vehicle of a believer.
4. The identity of the missionary. Not every Christian is a missionary. We must take the Gospel to where it has not yet gone. Globalization has increased the opportunities/ways people can be missionaries.
5. The role of the local church. Training should start here, churches should send missionaries and missionaries should desire a sending church.
6. The mobilization of the global church. Laborers for the harvest should come from the harvest: the nations on missions to the nations. In 2050, 40% of Christians will live in sub-Saharan Africa- this is a missions sending force!
7. The migration of peoples. God orchestrates the movement of peoples. Never before in history did the world have more displaced peoples (refugees) than it does right now.
8. The movement to cities. More than 50% of the world lives in cities now. Acts 19:10 - all Asia heard the Gospel because it was preached in a city.
9. The prevalence of poverty. Be gospel-centered, gospel preaching to the nations, many of which are very poor and very sick. Churches need to be planted there.
10. The spread of Islam. By 2050, the number of muslims will about equal the number of Christians in the world. Because Christians are delaying marriage, delaying childbearing, having less children.
11. The reality of illiteracy. Make the Gospel and word of God known, but there are still 1 billion people in the world who cannot read. We must prioritize oral sharing and oral methods as well.
12. The theology of suffering. We must train and teach missionaries how to suffer well. God specifically uses suffering for the spread of the Gospel. Acts 9:16 - Paul was appointed to suffer for Jesus’ namesake. 

10 Questions Pastors Should Ask Themselves

1. Are you, in your church, preaching the Word in the context of the world?
2. Are you calling people to radical identification with Christ?
3. Are you equipping and expecting ordinary disciples to make disciples in extraordinary ways?
4. Are you giving sacrificially for global missions?
5. Are you fasting and praying fervently for missions?
6. Are you continually communicating the general command [to make disciples] and periodically issuing a specific call [to be a missionary]?
7. Are you nurturing an atmosphere of sending out your best?
8. Are you celebrating continual (STMs) and creative (BAM, tent making) sending?
9. Are you stewarding the sending relationships God gives you?
10. Are you training your church to sacrifice willingly and suffer well?

Again, please use this forum as an avenue for discussion. I would love to engage with some of these things with you!

Week Three

Last week, we had to read Luke and Acts, paying close attention to evangelism and discipleship.

Although I have read Luke 10 and the surrounding context countless times, meditating on and even teaching on the “person of peace” method of evangelism, I have often overlooked the discipleship that is going on here. Reading Luke with the focused lense on discipleship showed me something I have often overlooked: Jesus models in the group setting, sends out in the group setting, debriefs in the group setting, and trains in the group setting. Everything he does is in a group! 

I was acutely aware of this after reading Misreading Scripture with Western Eyes (I highly recommend this book!) and learning about our individualistic and collectivistic differences with Scripture. In Luke 5, Jesus calls some of the disciples, not individually, but collectively. Then throughout chapters 6-9, he is either teaching in the presence of the disciples, performing miracles in the presence of the disciples, or specifically teaching the disciples. He models and explains/debriefs always in the context of the group, even when having a “personal” conversation.

Then, even before they are “ready” (the disciples are quite immature still and do not understand much of what Jesus has shown them), Jesus sends them out (ch 9) - also in that group context. When they return, they tell him everything (verse 10) and he “withdrew” with them, in what I must assume as an intentional time to debrief and teach them from what they experienced.

In this realization, I saw two things that I need to incorporate into my own discipleship methods: discipleship should happen in a group setting and people should be “sent out” to experience and practice ministry early, even before they are “ready”.
 

First Two Weeks

This is my first summary but I've finished the first two weeks of the ten week class. We read Misreading Scripture with Western Eyes in that time. In these two weeks, I've learned:

• We interact with Scripture and read it through several lenses, probably the most significant is that of our culture.

• Reading Scripture through my cultural lense limits me sometimes. The example the book shared was about how, in retelling the story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15), Westerners often forget to include the detail about the famine. We have never experienced famine, so it does not stick out. When compared to the retelling by Russians, they almost always included that detail and saw the story actually as an example of God’s sovereignty to bring his children back to himself vs how we tend to see it: the loving, open arms of the forgiving Father (both are accurate but the difference of take-away based on culture is interesting).

• Both Old and New Testaments were written by people from a collectivist society to people in a collectivist society. So, when I read it from the context of my individualistic society and apply it to my individualistic society, I can actually misinterpret or misapply or simply miss out on what the text meant. I realized I need to slow down my tendency to apply scripture personally and really read it deeply to ensure that was the intent of the author.

That's just a quick download of these two weeks. Let me know if you have questions! Click here and drop a comment or question for clarification (I'm testing out a blog!).